Of course it’s possible to get your ex back, but the question is, “are you willing to put in the effort into personal growth?”.

1. Don’t contact them… not right now. 

Firstly, give them time and space to cool off and miss what they had. Give yourself time figure out who you are and what you need to work on to be the best partner you can be.

2. Figure out what YOU are about.

Obsessing about someone else isn’t attractive. Not really. Everyone needs to be responsible for their OWN life and happiness. You need to throw yourself into YOU. Find passions, build networks, do things other than ruminate, obsess about and problem solve about your ex. Seriously, no one needs a stalker.. even if it’s only on social media. Build the confidence you want to project. It’s not impossible, but it takes real effort.

3. Wait

You won’t really be waiting. You will be building your own life and working on yourself. But hold “no contact” until you figure out how to be yourself, FOR yourself.

4. The universe will tell you what to do next

There’s nearly 100% chance that an occasion will naturally arrise to communicate with your ex. Wait for the RIGHT time and project the confidence you have worked so hard to build.. It will make them feel they are missing out (and they are!)

5. Reassess the Relationship

Take some time to reflect on what went wrong in the relationship. Was it a lack of communication, differing values, or maybe external pressures? Understanding the root causes of the breakup can help you gain clarity and prevent the same issues from resurfacing if you do reconnect. Make a list of what you want in a partner and what you can offer in return.

6. Consider Your Expectations

When contemplating a reunion, it’s essential to manage your expectations. Understand that rekindling a relationship might not look the way you envisioned. This isn’t about picking up where you left off; it’s about building a new relationship based on growth, understanding, and mutual respect. Be open to what that might look like.

7. Reconnect Casually

Once you feel ready and the time feels right, initiate a light conversation. This can be through a text, a casual coffee, or even a social gathering where you might run into each other. Keep the tone friendly and light-hearted. The goal is to reconnect without any pressure or heavy emotional baggage.

9. Take It Slow

If you both feel a spark and are interested in exploring the possibility of getting back together, take things slowly. Rushing back into the relationship might mean repeating old patterns. Instead, focus on building a strong friendship first and see where that leads. In the meantime, continue to focus on growing and nurturing your independence.

10. Be Prepared for Any Outcome

Understand that there’s a chance your ex may not feel the same way or might not want to rekindle the relationship. Be respectful of their feelings and decisions. If that happens, remember that it’s not a reflection of your worth. Learn to accept and move forward, knowing that you’ve done your best and focused on your own growth.

Ultimately, whether or not a reunion happens, what’s most important is your own journey of self-discovery and growth. A healthier, happier you will create a better foundation for any future relationships, whether with your ex or someone new. Additionally, it’s essential to prioritize self-care during this process. Engage in activities that bring you joy and promote well-being, such as exercising, pursuing hobbies, or spending time with supportive friends and family. These experiences will not only elevate your mood but also help you maintain a strong sense of identity outside of the relationship. Remember that self-improvement should always be a personal journey rather than a means to win someone back.

Lastly, consider the lessons you’ve learned from the relationship. Reflect on what worked and what didn’t, and use these insights to inform your future connections. Whether or not you end up with your ex, having a clear understanding of your relationship patterns will empower you to make healthier choices moving forward, ultimately leading to more fulfilling relationships in the future.